In a recent beautiful gathering, Antara Mohan and Sri Eswaran R engaged in a profound and soul-stirring conversation about the essence of happiness. The discussion, held before an eager and reflective audience, explored the timeless wisdom of Vedanta and its perspective on true joy—what it is, where it lies, and how we can access it from within.
The depth of this conversation was so impactful that we felt it was only right to share this version with all of you. Now, we are honored to bring this insightful exchange to a wider audience, in the hope that it may inspire reflection and inner peace as you explore the true nature of lasting happiness.
1. Sir, in today’s fast-paced world, most of us are relentlessly chasing happiness—through relationships, professional success, travel, and material achievements. Yet Vedanta gently reminds us that true happiness does not reside in the external world. May I ask, why then does this outward chase feel so compelling and real to us?
As long as one believes happiness comes from the world, the focus remains on the world. Yet, all human beings are ultimately seeking poornatvam—a sense of completeness. Recognize this first. Then ask: where is completeness, and where is it not?
If you believe it lies in wealth, name, fame, power, position, status, or relationships, Vedanta says: neti, neti—not that, not that. Even if you attain all seven, a sense of incompleteness may still remain.
What we truly seek is lasting, high-quality pleasure and freedom from sorrow. For instance, we eat not for food alone, but to end hunger—pain avoidance. We mistake these fleeting satisfactions for true happiness and keep searching in the world, like the old woman looking under a streetlight for a needle lost inside her hut.
Vedanta teaches us that the loss of happiness is imaginary—it was never truly lost. Real happiness is not regained but rediscovered. It is our own nature. Transcending the world comes not from frustration, but from deep understanding—and with that, the world no longer disturbs you.
2. The Bhagavad Gita beautifully states, “He who is unattached to external contacts and finds joy within, that yogi is united with Brahman.” Sir, could you kindly help us understand what it truly means to “find joy within”? How does one begin to shift the focus inward amidst the distractions and demands of modern life?
“Happiness is within” means it is not found in the world, the body, senses, mind, or intellect—it is the very nature of the Self. The happiness we seem to get from the world is only reflected happiness, like moonlight. Just as we see light coming from the moon but we do not see the mooon receiving the light from the sun. We mistake worldly happiness for being real and permanent.
The shift inward begins only when you see the world clearly. Once you realize that what you truly seek is not out there, a natural U-turn happens. The mind keeps promising fulfillment but never delivers. Life, as it has been lived so far, hasn't brought lasting satisfaction. Recognizing this is key. The Upanishads call this parikshya lokan—examining life. Observe your own experiences. Pleasure and pain often come from the same source. Every gain leads to further craving or fear of loss. Despite achievements and possessions, a chronic dissatisfaction remains.
Everything you enjoy creates dependence—bondage. Their presence doesn’t bring lasting joy, and their absence causes misery. When this is deeply understood, you turn inward, not out of despair, but out of wisdom.
3. Vedanta tells us that our essential nature is Ananda—pure bliss. Yet, many of us feel a deep restlessness or incompleteness, even after achieving what we thought would bring us happiness. Why is that so, Sir? What are we missing in our understanding of happiness?
The happiness we experience through contact with the world is merely the temporary cessation of mental agitation. What we call joy or pleasure is, in fact, the absence of mental disturbance.
To experience the bliss of the Self, one must make a sustained and deliberate effort—it takes time and commitment. This journey begins with understanding the Goal and the Means to achieve it. Remember: the greater the goal, the stronger the motivation; the higher the ideal, the deeper the inspiration. Shifting attention to the Self within is essential.
One might wonder, “How can I turn toward something I know nothing about?” This is where Vedanta plays a crucial role. It refines the subtle intellect, enabling it to conceive and visualize the grandeur of the Self.
Unfortunately, the pursuit of happiness is often seen as selfish, while seeking wealth, success, or knowledge appears socially acceptable. But when Vedanta says happiness is not in “the world,” it refers specifically to your world—the world as you perceive and relate to it. It's not that others possess happiness and are withholding it from you—they do not have it. The error lies in expecting the world to give you something it does not contain.
4. Swamiji often says, “Never let your present happiness lean on a future acquisition.” Sir, why does Vedanta caution us so strongly against placing our happiness in the future? What is the inner cost of this dependency?
Every action you perform is driven by desire. Desire is essentially the hope for future happiness—it is the way an unhappy mind attempts to find fulfillment. However, knowledge reduces this tendency by lessening the intensity of desiring.
What you imagine as a better future is often just a modified version of your past. For example, if you grew up in a joint family where six people shared a single room, having your own room may now seem like an ideal future. But this vision is simply an improvised past, not something truly new or transformative.
True happiness lies in the execution of action, not in its results.
At any given moment, there are two dimensions to your personality: the Doer and the Experiencer. The Doer becomes the Experiencer, facing the consequences of past actions. As a receiver of consequences, you are a passive participant—with no choice. And as a victim, how can one expect to be happy?
Happiness lies in performing one's obligatory duties with the right attitude. Hence, it is advised not to peg your present happiness to future acquisitions.
Agitation and disappointment are the costs of such dependence.
5. And finally, Sir, in your own quiet moments—when all labels, ambitions, and roles fall away—what remains? Could it be that the peace and silence we encounter within is the very happiness we have been seeking all along?
When you say "all falls away," is it a temporary suspension or a permanent dropping away? It is important to note that stunningness is not the same as saturation.
When the mind drops all sense of "me and mine," "thou and thine," it experiences a strange stillness—what Yoga refers to as chitta vritti nirodha. This must be clearly distinguished from a temporary state in which the mind, exhausted by constant activity, comes to a halt out of sheer fatigue. That is not the true state of stillness, because one cannot remain in it at will for any extended period. The pressure of unfulfilled desires eventually forces the mind to move and become active again.
Silence, in its true sense, is not something you enter and exit. True silence has a beginning—but no end.
Dr. Eswaran holds a doctorate in Psychotherapy and has specialized in Vedanta Philosophy. With over three decades dedicated to the study and research of Vedanta. He has conducted more than 7,500 hours of teaching across 5,000+ sessions in over six countries, addressing diverse audiences. In addition to his work in Vedanta, Dr. Eswaran serves as a life coach and mentor to business and corporate leaders, guiding them on values-based leadership and personal growth. He is also a regular contributor to leading publications on topics related to self-development, philosophy, and well-being. Dr. Eswaran is the Founder-Acharya of the Vedanta Institute Bangalore, a Public Charity.
