Lockdowns have trapped women and girls with abusive partners. They are isolated and cut off from support networks and resources
Every morning I wake up to a few messages on Sayfty’s social media pages. Usually, these are requests for help and read like, “I know a girl who is facing domestic violence (DV), please can you help?” One person asks, “Hey, do you help in the lockdown too? I have been going through domestic violence for four years and it’s been horrible.” My team and I get busy supporting victims of domestic violence, getting them the help they need.
More than 90 countries are under lockdown with four billion people confined to their homes. However, little do most people realise that for millions of women, “home” is not a safe place during a lockdown. As the world scrambled to flatten the Coronavirus curve, the DV curve surged across the globe. In France, DV cases increased by 30 per cent while in Argentina, emergency calls regarding DV increased by 25 per cent, Cyprus and Singapore helplines registered an increase in calls of 30-33 per cent. The UK, US, Spain, India and other countries, have all witnessed a rise in violence at home.
Lockdowns have trapped women and girls with abusive partners. They are isolated and cut off from support networks and resources. Victims are no longer able to pick up the phone and call for help because they are being watched by the abuser constantly. They are unable to step out of that door and seek support.
The truth is that DV has persisted in our homes for generations. A fact most of us choose to ignore. DV, like all forms of abuse, is about power. And during this pandemic, men are using violence to control women’s minds, bodies, economic capacities and mobility. It is a deliberate action carried out against the victim with a sense of entitlement over their bodies. And nothing can or should justify violence against women/girls.
So, what have countries done so far to address DV during this pandemic?
France is offering hotel rooms for victims of abuse. The Government will pay for 20,000 hotel nights for victims and put in place approximately 20 counselling centres at stores across the country in order for women to be able to seek help when they run errands.
In Germany, the Green Party’s parliamentary leader, Katrin Göring-Eckardt, said she feared for the lives of thousands of women trapped with violent partners and called on the Government to free up money for safe houses.
In Greece, officials said they were stepping up a campaign to help women cope with problems clearly emerging from the issue of confinement.
A prosecutor in Trento, Italy, has ruled that in cases of DV the abuser must leave the family home and not the victim.
In India the National Commission for Women has launched a WhatsApp number (+91 7217735372) to facilitate quick and increased reporting, taking cognisance of the increase in violence.
So, the big question is, what can a citizen do as a bystander?
Now more than ever, bystander intervention is vital. Each one of us, even under a lockdown, can actively intervene online or in the offline space if we see someone experiencing harassment or violence. Here are five ways that can help citizens speak out, identify, engage or respond to a situation of domestic abuse.
Delegate: Which means get help from someone else. For example, in India, you can dial 100 for the police or 181 to connect to the women’s helpline number after checking with the person facing harassment or abuse.
Delay: Wait for the incident to be over and then check in with the person harassed or abused. You can call the person, message them or use another creative way to check on them like through a chat feature on an online game and so on.
Distract: Is to use an indirect approach to de-escalate the situation and divert the attention of the abuser away from the violence to give the victim a break. A common way to do this, if the incident is happening in your neighbourhood, is to ring the bell and ask to borrow something, like a cup of milk. The famous #RingTheBell campaign by Breakthrough is a classic example of how to distract an abuser.
Document: You can document the violence using your phone or a camera. Remember, while documenting the incident, try to film undercover and give the videos and photos to the person facing the violence. Consent is important. Let them decide what to do with it.
Direct: Speak up when you see a incident of DV. You can do so by naming the behaviour. You can say, “Domestic violence is a crime.” Name what you see. “It looks like she is physically hurt and very scared.” Ask the abuser a question, “Why are you beating her?”
A word of caution: When intervening, please ensure your own safety first. If you don’t feel safe intervening, get help. Be vigilant. DV, most of the time, is occurring behind closed doors and is less talked about. In fact in India, less than 14 per cent of women who have experienced physical or sexual violence seek help.
While a majority of us are following the shelter-in place order, many first responders like postal workers, garbage collectors, food delivery staff are out and about through neighborhoods doing their jobs. They may have an opportunity to detect violence and report to the authorities. If you know of someone facing violence, ask them how they would prefer to connect? Stay in touch with them through creative ways. Once you have safely established a way to connect, help them find a DV shelter or a helpline number. Think through a safety plan with the victim. One safety plan does not fit all. Abuse, harassment and violence is different in each incident. Each situation is unique and will require a different intervention.
These are difficult and unusual times for all. While we are physically cut away from each other, don’t let that prevent you from raising your voice and using your resources for another pandemic called gender-based violence. When will we try to flatten this persistent curve?
(The writer is founder and CEO,Sayfty)
