While it is important to voice your ideas, it is equally vital to listen to others. This helps you gain more respect as a speaker, which certainly increases your chances of being heard, says Pramath Raj Sinha
How often have you found yourself in a situation where not everyone agrees with your point of view? It could be in a boardroom, a conference with senior colleagues, a client meeting, a team presentation or even at a social event. You might have preferred to keep quiet to avoid an argument or got into one that could have turned nasty. Both reactions are equally undesirable. The first reaction makes you appear submissive and the second only shows your aggression. You could be perceived as argumentative and your message or point of view can be lost.
Making yourself heard or getting your point of view across is gratifying and empowering. More importantly, it gives you visibility, influence and credibility, all of which you need to succeed at work.
How do you drive our point home without seeming argumentative and opinionated? Speaking effectively is the art of getting through a swinging door when someone else is pushing from the opposite direction. You do this by pushing back hard but waiting for an opening. It needs skill and strategy. You need to give way to get your way.
Meetings, both online and offline, are a great way to collaborate and present your point but sometimes your voice might get lost in the myriad of voices. Or you may appear brash if you tend to disagree with your superior. Hence, preparation is the key.
Prepare by understanding your audience: You need to ask yourself why you have been invited to this meeting and how you can contribute to the bigger goal. Be a keen listener and try to understand other people’s perspective. This will help you identify possible roadblocks and alliances that you can prepare for.
Give respect and appreciate: As an active listener, summarise what you have heard. For example, you could say, “For the past 10 minutes we’ve learned…” or “Correct me if I am wrong...” Encourage others to speak or seek feedback by saying, “Tell me what you think.” It always helps when you encourage others, especially quieter colleagues, to speak up and facilitate their inputs for the larger group.
Educate, don’t blame or accuse: When it’s your turn to speak, present your views without sounding accusatory or dismissive. You should act as a facilitator who is purposeful but not dominant. It is more effective to say things with confidence without drowning other people’s voices. Choose your words carefully; sound friendly and calm. The right tone, volume and pitch will go a long way in making your voice heard, especially, in today’s world when most meetings and discussions have moved online. With body language often lost behind the camera, your pitch and tone are all you have to speak effectively. And you must get them right!
Be open to feedback and criticism: Present your critique in a way that invites feedback and discussions. Be open to criticism or negative feedback. Remember, this is a discussion, a collaboration and it’s important to be a team player.
Don’t be hesitant or shaky. Speak with certainty: Never sound vague. Always back your arguments with supporting rationale, data and examples. Be brief, concise and to the point when you’re presenting your case. People have a short attention span, so stick to the topic and avoid using jargons. This is even more important in the digital world where you have multiple distractions.
Be polite, humble and patient: Use pronouns such as ‘we’, ‘us’ and ‘our’ to signal yourself as a team player committed to the bigger goals of the team. Don’t interrupt when someone else is speaking. Wait for your turn to speak. Make a note if you have something significant to add and speak only when the person has finished talking. In online meetings, always turn off your microphone or put it on mute when you aren’t speaking.
While it is important to voice your ideas, it is equally vital to listen to others. This helps understand and absorb their views and you’re perceived as thoughtful leader. You’re likely to gain more respect as a speaker, increasing your chances of being heard.
(The writer is the founder and chairman of Harappa Education.)
