Through anecdotes and real life experiences, journalist and writer Ziya Us Salam’s new book, Nikah Halala: Sleeping With A Stranger, reveals how the pious practice has morphed into a game of lust, completely opposite of what the Quran allows. He tells Chahak Mittal why it is the right time to dispel such misconceptions about Islamic practices
On a regular summer day in 2019, a journalist had gone to a madrasa with a spy camera and a fictitious story of a known PhD scholar who wanted to remarry her husband after an instant triple talaq but didn’t know the way out. He was referred to some of the people around and a man came up with a suggestion — nikah halala. “Marry her to a carpenter who works here,” he said. He would divorce her in two days after consummating the marriage, post which she could go back to her previous husband. When the journalist refused the offer, stating the social incompatibility between the two as a reason, the man offered his own candidature. And in turn, he asked for Rs 30,000, an amount which the journalist refused as he couldn’t afford it with an income of Rs 25,000 and a family of four. After some bargaining, the man finally came down to Rs 15,000.
Journalist and writer Ziya Us Salam amusingly recalls this story on the other end of the phone, while talking about his recent book, Nikah Halala: Sleeping With A Stranger. It aims to present the realities of marriage and divorce in Islam, marking the differences between how the Quran looks at relationships and how the people misuse them. While the holy book does not mention instant triple talaq, the tradition of nikah halala is unique to the Indian subcontinent that claims to bring squabbling couples together but ends up making a mockery of the faith and punishes women for the crimes of men.
Ziya says that Nikah Halala... has been written as a comparative volume after the book, Till Talaq Do Us Part: Understanding Talaq, Triple Talaq and Khula (2018). “After the book, there was a lot of curiosity among people about nikah halala. Many people who read it told me that they wanted to know more about the concept and how it functions in our society. I had also at the time come across some people who had a different perspective. I felt I must clarify before the average reader what the Quran says about nikah halala and what is the reality of the practice in India,” adds he.
The nikah halala, according to Muslim Personal Laws, dictates that a woman must consummate her marriage with another man if she wants to go back to her former husband, whom she has divorced. However, there are a number of misconceptions around the practice, which not only lead to its manipulation but exploits women hugely. So how does the book address these myths? Ziya tells us, “I have spoken about the Quranic injunctions of the subject. The three verses of the Quran — from 229 to 231 — talk about the divorce, multiple divorce and the nikah halala. As per the divorce section, the Quran allows it twice. The man can divorce his wife once, post which there is a three-month waiting period. In that span, the woman has to stay with her husband and the two can try to reconcile. If the man takes back his words and establishes the reconciliation in bed, the talaq is ruled out and the marriage continues.”
However, if it doesn’t happen for three months, the woman moves out of the husband’s house but both are still given a chance to rethink, after which if they want to get back together, they can have a proper nikah again without any third party intervening. In case things fall apart again, three months are again given for reconciliation. However, if now there comes a second divorce and then the third one after a second nikah, the two cannot remarry.
“The Quran now completely establishes a woman’s independence. She should not become an object of play in the hands of a whimsical husband who just thinks that he can take back his wife whenever he wants to and then again give talaq. After the third divorce, the woman is independent to get married to another man if she wants to,” says Ziya, adding that now if her second husband dies or she wants to go back to her former husband, the two can remarry.
He adds, “Now, it’s called a nikah halala! However, it cannot be one if it has a pre-decided date of divorce. It cannot be a planned course that a man has now given triple talaq to his wife and he wants her back, so she has to marry some other man for a night, who then divorces her so the former husband can take her back. They cannot marry just to be divorced the next day. That’s not how it works. That’s not how Quran allows it.”
One of the chapters in Ziya’s book narrates an incident of a man who had made a business out of nikah halala. In early 1990s, Islamuddin left for Bombay to earn a livelihood, leaving his wife and children in Sasaram. While struggling day and night to find some relief in the new city, the man met an acquaintance who suggested he marry a woman for two nights and ask for an amount in return and then divorce her. This would not only make him earn a little extra but also let the woman go back to her divorced husband. He suggested Islamuddin to become a nikah halala husband.
While that was how it worked in the pre-digital era, on social media, today, trolls have been using nikah halala as a threat/abuse. Several websites and blogs have been conceptualised to offer halala marriage services to women who have been divorced by their first husbands. One such currently active Twitter page’s bio reads, “Assalamu’alaykum Alhmadulillah, this is a marriage service for Muslims worldwide. Take an advantage of it now.”
Ziya comments, “People are completely ignorant about the provisions of nikah halala. These blogs and Facebook pages offer various men’s candidature to be a halala husband and surprisingly, most of them are pretty well-off and educated people settled in places like Dubai and Kuwait. This is highly prominent in Pakistan. They are ready to take an international flight to India and do a nikah halala for two-three days, consummate the marriage, divorce the woman and then go back.”
He says that while for some the intention of doing nikah halala is completely pious and pure — to help their brothers or sisters in need — what they do not know is that this is not the way of the Quran. Adds he, “Having said that, there are also ill-intentioned people around us who are just trying to fulfill their lust. But both of them are wrong. And it’s only the woman who suffers. And that’s exactly what my book highlights.”
Is the book an attempt to change the dialogue as to how Muslims and their traditions are perceived in India? The writer says that since he is a pratising Muslim, he has known his community inside out and hence, wants to bring out the wrongs. He adds, “I am criticising a Muslim practice being a part of this religion because I know very well what is afflicting the community.”
He recalls his book Women in Masjid: A Quest For Justice, which talked about how mosques do not allow women to pray inside their premises as men, a restriction which is not granted by the Quran but is practised widely. He says, “In the book, I pointed out that across India, masjids have no provisions for women. They not only bar women actively but also practically. There are no toilets or no musallahs (prayer mats) available to them in the mosque. Even the biggest two, Nizamuddin and Haji Ali Dargah, have strict regulations for women’s entry. After that book, one of the mosques in Seelampur addressed its gathering one evening and talked about how women also have the complete right to practise their religion and pray in mosques just as men do. Some of the imams of the masjid had read the book and they changed some of the provisions of their premises. So when a book can change the way religious practices are followed, why should I not write about it?”
He also recalls how a woman journalist, after his book Till Talaq Do Us Part..., “finally divorced her violent and abusive husband who had also given her an (invalid) instant triple talaq.”
Looking at history, religion is quite sensitive and comes with a certain kind of censorship in India. So how does Ziya keep such sensitivities in mind? He believes that every religion, irrespective of whether it is Islam, Hinduism, Christianity or Sikhism, is “male-dominated.” He adds, “A religious society is designed by men to suit their taste. If as a Muslim, I criticise certain practices of other religions, whether it is Hinduism or Sikhism, it may not be taken in the right spirit, given the times we are living in. So just like I said, I am a practising Muslim. And it’s also a reason why I’m more likely to be given a patient hearing. They are more likely to listen to me if I am calling out that practice. Also, when one is speaking the truth, you don’t have to think whether it’s the right time to speak it or not. Reality never transforms. When you are talking about a good thing in any religion, there’s never a wrong time to say it. The book in a way expresses the Quran. I think this is also the best time to dispel any misconceptions about Islam.”
On a lighter note, the quarantine period has turned out to be quite productive for Ziya given that apart from Nikah Halala..., two of his other works have been published and are releasing — Inside the Tablighi Jamaat and Shaheen Bagh: From a Protest to a Movement. He chuckles and says that the first book was already drafted in 2019 and had to be published in April. But alas, “the lockdown!”
