Thugs of Hindostan

*ing: Amitabh Bachchan, Aamir Khan, Katrina Kaif, Fatima Sana Shaikh, Lloyd Owen, Mohammed Zeeshan Ayyub, Ronit Roy, Satyadev Kancharana

Rated: 6/10

First of all, these are no pirates — of Caribbean or otherwise. They are pre-Independence patriots who happen to take the sea route to mount operations against the East India Company, and the British intent to gobble up territory and pride of local maharajas and Baigs who live perilously in forts that have long turned pregnable.

Aamir Khan is doing no Jack Sparrow, thankfully! Had he been doing so, he would have been an unmitigated disaster in the role of Firangi Mallah. There is no fantasy either, of the creepy crawly POC kinds. The only element which comes close to fantasy is Khan sporting a nose pin, with elan if you please! Does that work to make the film in any way differently enabled? Far from it, and that despite the two titans of the industry — Amitabh Bachchan and Aamir Khan — coming together on screen for the first time ever.

Yes that was ambitious, as is the film itself, mounting Hollywoodish action in an 18th century period drama. The film is beautiful, artistically orchestrated and full of fantastic action. It engages but not emotion or sentiment.

Both Aamir and Amitabh are woefully wasted, both with acumen to set the screen blazing, both with larger than life screen presence — both wasted by being put into roles that were wishy-washy despite grandstanding names like Khudabaksh Jahaazi and Firangi Mallah.

Aamir, a thug living a life pegged on unmitigated deceit, and Amitabh abuzz with patriotism and warrior-ship. But when the twain meet, it all fizzles out, more starkly because the two coming together for the first time were expected to show some spark, any spark, not no spark at all as the case is. This is the biggest fizzler, the other being a here and there storyline which plays into the hands of excellent production quality, localing, recreating the 1757 period and all else that could get the art director his Filmfare.

From a production house like Yash Raj Films such perfection in quality of filmmaking is expected. What is unexpected is a weak plot and storyline, that too when it was so full of potential. Marrying yesterday with tomorrow in a groovy kind of way is what Thugs of Hindostan promised to be all about. But despite the lean mean Robert Clive, despite the history of freedom struggle, despite the presence of the Big 2 of Bollywood, the film kind of raises questions.

The music, except for the Suraiya song and over-exploited Dhoom-like gyrations of Katrina Kaif, writes no stunning notes, which is surprising for an Aditya Chopra Production. The heroine Sana Shaikh as Zafira does a good job but fails to make a mark for no fault of hers.

For action, this one is good to go but both Bachchan and Aamir fans will leave the hall highly underfed. Some might even say they have been thugged!  The film, at best, is like a slice of blueberry cheese cake from Big Chill which tastes like something from Kallu’s dhaba. Those who know not Big Chill will enjoy it as a good bite from Kallu’s.