The suicide of at least 4000 children between 2017 and 2019 after failing in exams is a clarion call for both parents and educational institutes. MUSBA HASHMI speaks with experts to bring you a report on what led children take such a drastic step for something as simple as passing marks

India’s total medal tally in the Tokyo Olympics 2020 stands at 7 with a glittering Gold by Neeraj Chopra in Javelin Throw, as opposed to the US, which is leading at 105, followed by China at 87. But the low medal tally doesn’t dilute the fact that our athletes made us proud in several games. However, some are upset with this count.

In another shocker, at least 4000 students reportedly have committed suicide between 2017 and 2019 after meeting with a failure in examinations. You must be wondering how the two are related. But, they are.

The Tokyo Olympics 2020 is an eye opener for us to understand that there is much more in life apart from maintaining the winning streak in academics. And to question and even nullify the adage: Padhoge likhoge to banogey nawaab, kheloge kudoge to banogey kharab.

It’s high time we understand that scoring straight As or 100s, isn’t the only way out to bring pride to the family.

“The education system in India has been about results and numbers, at least for decades. Beyond a doubt, that does create pressure among students, which may have been a reason for many of these unfortunate suicides. The increasing number of student suicides is a serious concern, but linking thousands of these suicides to just academics is rather unfair, especially when schools vouch for change,” says Sapna Charha, headmistress, Modern Public School, Shalimar Bagh.

Indian schools traditionally foster a competitive environment, also because higher education and the job market are equally competitive. That said, we are seeing a tidal change in how students are being evaluated for performance, focusing more on growth rather than just one exam.

“National schools have already committed to extra-curricular activities, an easy grading system, and intra-personal relationships. It is always up to the school and parents to ensure that students don’t feel the pressure to a point where it doesn’t become a do-or-die situation. As schools do their best to minimise the pressure, parents have a dominant role to play, where the social/personal life of a student is given priority,” adds Charha.

The question, however, remains why isn’t sports given equal space in the assessment criteria. Why does it have to succumb to the likes of major subjects like Physics, Chemistry, Maths and Economics. More so, when sports is considered nearly a religion and sportspersons Gods.

“Schools in India always had sports in the curriculum. There is, however, no denying that teachers and parents typically want students to be more academically inclined. This is also why the focus on sports was marginal. It is also important to understand that barring cricket, most sports, and related activities were rarely in the limelight. A few years back, it was hard to convince students, or their parents, to go for a career that focuses exclusively on sports,” Charha says.

However, she believes that times are changing, and schools identify students who are more likely to do better in sports and extracurricular activities.

“There are also better training facilities and options for students. If students want to pursue a career in sports, they have more choices now than a decade back. We think this is an exciting time, where students can choose to be what they want, and schools are supporting as much as possible,” she tells you.

It is important to understand that schools have always competed on academics. Results matter for evaluating performance, and when it comes to numbers, academic achievements are easier to quantify. Times are changing, and today, we encourage every talent in our school, not just restricted to sports and academics, she adds.

Almas, a Class X student, however, feels that sports isn’t given enough importance as a subject, let alone for assessment. “In most of the schools that I know of, sports remain on the backseat. In fact, many schools just have one Physical Exercise class a week. This shows hypocrisy. Why does not schools let children select whether they want a sports class daily or weekly. It should be out of personal choice and not obligation,” she says.

This is not all. The hypocrisy continues when parents who won’t let their child play football for more than an hour a day, let alone take it up as a profession, complain about the low medals or take pride in Mirabai Chanu’s Silver. “The changes have to start from the grassroot level. Come Boards, and a child is expected to get into this bubble of studying the whole day. This kind of pressure not only demotivates children to think beyond academics, but also kills their talent in all forms,” she adds.

This proves that education today calls for more inclusivity and not obligations to study a particular subject or course.

Dr Priya Kaul, Spiritual Healer and Life Coach, says that the major reason as to why students fail to score well is the pressurised education system. The high level of competition is also one of the major reasons why a child feels pressured as he has to prove himself and stay at par with others.

“As students are under a high pressure to prove themselves, there is an absence of motivation in them due to which they lack interest. All these issues are interlinked and the lack of interest further draws the lack of effort which is clearly reflected in their results. Some students are unable to handle this pressure and when they fail to get that perfect score, they find it okay to  take their lives,” says Kaul.

One of the major reasons for students failing today, she says, is our poor education system and old school methods.  The age-old system of education focuses on numbers and is ruled by percentages, due to which students are under constant pressure of performing and all time have a fear of non-acceptance by their peers and societies if they are not in league of merit scholars.

Pulkit Sharma, a clinical psychologist, tells you that he has counselled several students who were depressed after failing to secure good marks. “There are cases when parents expect their children to secure 100 in every subject. And anything less than that brings shame to the family. The pressure is so humongous that students find it easier to give up on their lives than to spend it listening to what embarrassment they have caused to their families. In such cases, it becomes hard to counsel a child. Because he has grown up in an environment where marks decide and rule the future,” Sharma tells you.

It is not without the support and effort of parents that one can counsel such children. “Parents should understand that no two children can share the same IQ level. Hence, drawing comparisons with other children is the worst thing one can do to his child. It does irreplaceable damage to them. The other thing is to recognise your child’s strengths and weaknesses. Appreciate him for his strength and work with him on his weakness. This is the only way to sail through the tough and risky academic years,” opines Sharma.

Prakriti Poddar, Global Head for Mental Health at Round Glass, Managing Trustee Poddar Foundation, says that it is disheartening when we hear the news of a child committing suicide.

“It is tough to imagine what led the child to take such a step but more often than not, it is the increasing societal and family pressure that leads to such incidents. Our society has made competition a part of life and when a child falters in the race to the top, s/he is looked upon as a failure. This puts immense pressure on children to excel at everything that they do which is not humanly possible. Gradually, the child moves into stress, anxiety, depression, excessive worrying and burnout. When the pressure to perform becomes too much to handle, they often end up as victims of suicide,” says Poddar.

She agrees with Sharma and says that parents need to understand that their kids are not superheroes. They cannot excel at everything or win every time.

“It is good to keep a track of their progress but when they fail, the parents should come up and support the child. Instead of making them feel guilty, parents need to encourage their child and show them that this is not the end of the world. Parents are the biggest support of every child and it’s important for them to understand what the child is going through if there are any signs of stress or anxiety. Also, the schools need to be more attentive towards children’s behaviour and instill in them that failure is nothing but a step towards success. Effective mental health strategies that engage the entire school community is also a good way to create an environment where students feel safe and secure,” opines Poddar.  

Chahra says academic stress is real, and as a school, we identify with that. “There are a bunch of measures that can be considered, and many schools and universities, including ours, are adopting these approaches. Besides introducing mental health awareness, meditation and yoga, we also focus on extracurricular activities for all classes,” she says.

Schools also need to emphasize on student experience, for which a dedicated team must be assigned. “A personalised approach to teacher-student interaction will also make a big difference, especially in schools. Universities and colleges should consider counseling for students in need. Like we discussed earlier, it is an absolute necessity to find breaks in the academic routine, for which extracurricular activities can be really helpful. Sports, talent workshops, field trips, and inter-school/college events can break the monotony of classroom education,” opines Chahra.

Family and parents also have a dominant role in how students eventually feel and handle the stress of scoring well. “Educational institutions need to encourage more parent-teacher meetings, especially in schools, where they can discuss a student’s performance — not just in marks or grades, but in terms of mental awareness, physical wellbeing, and emotional understanding. The shift of emphasis from just academics to a more inclusive learning environment will take time and effort. With the New Education Policy, the system is changing, and schools are following the change, evolving accordingly to support and mentor the students, who are undoubtedly the future of our country,” Chahra concludes.